I have my period. I know that’s no excuse… But it’s a reason, right? I’m having the worst day ever. I want to go curl up in my bed and watch netflix all day. But I can’t. Life still goes on!
I’m all yucky downstairs, my back is sore, my head hurts, and every tiny little mouth noise my husband makes makes me want to scream!
And that’s not even getting to the part where I’m actually disappointed I’m not pregnant.
But none of that matters, really. There are still things I have to do. Housework. Pay bills. Answer the phone. Take my daughter to the dentist. Bickering to deal with. The dog ripped into the trash.
I’ve already messed up today. I told my son to shut up. I yelled at my daughter for stomping around like an elephant while I was on the phone. I haven’t read my bible or hugged any of the kids, and my husband left for work by saying, “I hope you’re in a better mood later!”
It’s ten thirty in the morning, and I feel like the worst mother in the world.
Where do I even go from here?
Dear Maxi Sad,
Take a deep breath. Take two. If you can hear your daughter squealing because your son is chasing her, lean over and kick the door shut for a minute.
There, that’s better.
I have bad news and I have good news.
The bad news is… there will always be these days. As long as our periods leave us literally and emotionally drained, as long as stupid dogs love the smell of stupid chicken bones in stupid trash bags, as long as children poke each other and run away and there are wrong sides of beds to wake up on, there will be these days. And you will mess them up.
But there’s good news, too.
The good news is found in 1 Timothy 1:15. Read it out loud.
Jesus Christ came to save sinners, of which you are the worst.
Yes, Yes, I know. It actually says “I am the worst.” But we’re not talking about me. We’re talking about you. You said you were the worst mother in the world, right?
You know the gospel, right? You know that Jesus, the Son of God, came to the earth to save us from ourselves. From the sin that had us in chains. You may have heard that story. You may have said the prayer. You may wear a cross at your neck, and listen to The JoyFM, and sing How-Deep-the-Fathers-Love-For-Us-How-Vast-Beyond-All-Measure while lifting your hands in a very trendy emotional worship service every Sunday.
But do you know what it actually means today? Right now?
It means that your messy morning is covered by the blood. Pretty ironic, isn’t it.
Bright red, disgusting, stomach-flopping blood.
It means that right now, in your messy house, with your messy life, in your messy pants, and your messy-faced children… you are clean.
You are forgiven, ALREADY, for the things you’re regretting. You’re clean, even if your body is dirty. Your heart is still beloved of the Lord.
So… what? You still don’t FEEL like living like that. You still FEEL grumpy and irritable and overwhelmed. Or maybe just whelmed.
Here’s where you go from here.
When you know what you ought to do- love on your children, control your temper, stop being lazy… but you don’t FEEL like it, it’s extremely simple.
You ignore your feelings.
Yes, you heard me. It’s impossible, you say? Yes, you’re right. It IS impossible. You are entirely incapable of ignoring those messy, irritable emotions you’re feeling.
You’re the worst mother in the world, remember?
THAT’S where the blood comes in.
You see, the message of the gospel is that you are SAVED. And one really awesome thing about that is that you are saved FROM YOUR EMOTIONS.
You aren’t ruled by them! You have this SUPERNATURAL BLOOD POWER to do the impossible- to overcome your OWN FEELINGS!!!
WHOA! Did you know this?
To be honest, I didn’t know this for YEARS. I was a Christian for a long time, and I was one of those “infants tossed by the waves” that Ephesians 4:14 talks about. Every emotion I felt completely controlled me. I knew it was wrong, I TRIED doing better. But it was impossible. I could never get control over my own emotions. You might feel like this. It’s pretty normal.
But the day came where I learned this, this awesome, amazing tool:
The supernatural key to overcoming the impossible of your emotions is just to CHOOSE.
Choose. That’s it.
It’s weird, I know. But at this very moment, in fact, every moment, you have choices.
You choose whether to play Candy Crush or open your bible.
You choose whether to start a load of laundry or flop on the couch.
You choose whether to yell at your child or speak gently.
And way, way, WAY too often, we know what’s right- and we tell ourselves, “I need to do better. I’m GOING to do better.” You think to yourself, “I’m TRYING to choose.”
But do you know what? It’s very likely that beforehand, you’re desiring to do right, but in the actual moment, you’re choosing not to. Instead, you’re saying, “I can’t.”
“It’s too hard.”
“I don’t want to.”
“It’s not fair.”
So you don’t.
You’re choosing NO.
And then, you fail to experience the supernatural. You fail to walk in victory, to experience the abundant life- the amazing thing that the Lord does for us.
I’m not here to condemn you or make you feel guilty. I’m here to tell you about the awesome part of your choices…
You see, the blood that covers our sins also gives us the rise-from-the-dead POWER of Christ.
And the way we ACCESS that power is by the simple act of choosing, in the moment, to go God’s way. That’s all he asks of us.
And then HE, Christ, comes in and DOES it. Through us, in his power.
It’s the really awesome part of Christian life… That we don’t get saved and then go out into the world to do it all ourselves! No! This is the part where his power has a daily, transforming effect on our lives.
Isn’t that awesome?
But the thing about these messy days is that the emotions and the phone ringing and the kids running and your pad filling make you feel like you don’t have a choice. Like you’re forced to yell and cry and throw things and crawl under the covers. But that’s a lie. You do have a choice.
And those statements? You can’t? It’s too hard? It’s not fair? They’re lies, too. You have to believe the truth, and CHOOSE it, in the moments. That’s where the magic happens.
So right now, I want you to try something. Lean back in your chair, breathe deep, and ask the Lord to show you this is true.
Ask the Holy Spirit to prompt you in the moments and show you your choices.
Commit, NOW, to choosing his way, and then ask him to help you, in the moments, to choose his way then.
I promise. It will change everything.
Oh, I don’t mean that these days won’t happen. I don’t even mean you won’t mess up. You’re still a human, right? But I think if you embrace this, it will be the key to a much greater level of maturity in the faith. There will be less of “these days,” and when they do come, you’ll have the supernatural ability to deal with them.
And a little extra advice, for free?
Cross 3 things off your list for the day. Do it. I’ll wait. Okay, done? Now open the door, call your children in. Wrap your arms around them and say these words.
“I’m sorry. I love you and I’m glad you’re my children. I’ve been grumpy with you and I shouldn’t have been. Please forgive me.”
And now… Go out there and face that mess. Don’t think you’re going to do it perfectly. But go confidently, knowing that your sins are forgiven, and the same spirit that raised Christ from the dead lives in YOU and will give you power. Choose life.
28 Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”
New Posts go up (Lord Willing) on Wednesdays.
God bless you!